Posts tagged ‘entertainment’

Living on the edge of a slippery slope with good intentions

All those phrases people use. Nuts. First, I’m pretty sure the pathway to hell is not paved with good intentions. Second, of course it’s a slipper slope. Third, I’ll address the edge business even though it isn’t technically one of “Those phrases”. I find this phrase to be…lame. It’s something I picture hearing a “supposed risk taker” in an 80’s flick saying to a dweeb that he needs to exploit. Also, hello Aerosmith. Bon Jovi was livin on a prayer. To both I say, death to the tyrants! Bon jovi is so close to James Taylor on my crap list that they could do a pound…if either of them was cool enough to do such a thing…which they aren’t.

Also, punctuation rant. I am the queen of the over-use of the period…………Why you ask? In all honesty, I feel like pausing is a vital aspect of speaking….and the other punctuation just isn’t cutting it. However, tonite was an exclamation point type of nite. Why you ask again? My, aren’t we inquisitive this evening? (Questions answered with questions are awesome. eg. “What’s with you today?”  “What’s with today, today?”) Some of you got that. Some of you didn’t. I weep for those who are staring at that reference blankly. I said blankly and had a flashback to Blank Man. That was a sad two seconds. Damon Wayans, the saddest of the wayans brothers solely because of that voice and big bald head of his. Although, no matter what others say, I did kind of love Earth Girls Are Easy. Mock me all you want. I care not. “A UFO landed in my pool and they captured me but we made friends and I fed them Pop-Tarts and they’re here now but Ted’s coming home tonight so we’ve got to cut their hair.” Wait, now that I think about it, Damon had the best roles of the Wayans….so maybe life compensated him for the voice and bald head.  Hmm, who knew life was a philanthropist. Oh, back to the topic at hand, punctuation! That’s right, exclamation point! Because after all, an exclamation point is just a period that can bungee jump…or commit suicide. One is definitely more bleak. I’m more of an under-score girl myself. You know, out of the way. Not like 6 feet in the ground out of the way. However, if the exclamation point is doing itself in….   !  ->  _     If p then q, people.  Rambling. Moving on.

Different realm of rant. Kids and sickness. Now, I’m not a doctor, but it seems to me that kids are doing this whole sickness dealy a lot more often lately. I mean granted, I wasn’t tallying how many kids were out when I was in school, but I know that I was rarely ever sick. Now, that’s not because I was some freakishly healthy child. So, my assumption is that there is some other reason why kids are ALWAYS sick. My kid, yea…sick…again. Is the plague starting up again or something? Did I miss the memos being tacked to our front doors about the black death? My phone is a little shoddy at times, so maybe I’m missing the state alerts or something. I know when there is a tornado watch I get the announcements. Is it a low budget issue? It seems to me that there are a couple other programs that could have gone first before disabling the hotline for plague awareness. I also know that the Toll booth on 95 near our house is like $5 a pop also and I figure that alone might cover the alert system. I mean, fifty million cars piled up, waiting to cram through those tolls at $5/car = cha ching. Just saying. Where was I? Oh, kids get sick a lot. End rant. P.s. I don’t really believe an apple a day does anything to keep the doctors at bay. Sounds like a scheme by apple growers, if you ask me. Truly, end rant.

Tattoos? To be or not to be, that is the question. I’d love to get some. AAAAAnd at the same time I’m a big wussy. Then I remind myself of people I have known that have tattoos and think…if they can do it, boy George, so can I! (see what I did there? Accident…but I’m not fixing it.)I don’t know how George is, but apparently he was a doer.  No, there will be no roses, no chinese symbols, no freaky little cherubs or vines crawling anywhere. There will be nothing in shades of pink or written in curvy little sparking letters with stars. I’m so very picky.  But I’ve got a plan. And no, you are not privy to it…or my inner workings. I like to keep it on the D.L. Piercings, however, I do not think are in my future.

I probably won’t have any shows to go to in the month of June (due to my trip) and that’s making me a bit antsy.  Mind you, there are two awesome BlackHAnd shows this month. First, June 3rd at JB McGuinnes in New Castle. Second, June 10th at Mojo 13. I will sadly be gone for both, but am sure they will rock the socks off your ever-loving feets, should you choose to accept this mission. We have a load of concerts this year though and not having one in June is disappointing. APC is in July though. I can make it, I can make it. Oh, except I have been informed that Josh Freese (the drummer) is not going on tour with them because he is drumming with Weezer. What the heck is that?!?!?! Seriously. First, A Perfect Circle hasn’t toured in what, six years…and he’s not coming along with them? That’s messed up. And let’s add insult to injury, he’s leaving them behind to tour with Weezer. Really?! Ok, now here is where I calm some of you down. Old Weezer = good. New Weezer = !  -> _     Refer to former segment on punctuation if you are having trouble.

And I’m done for tonite. Time to sleep and have some weird dreams. I watched a documentary on The birth of rock n’ roll, so I will probably dream about Jerry Lee Lewis or Chuck Berry or something. Buddy Holly was there, but if I dream of him, it will probably connect to my irritation with the whole weezer scenario and things might get messy. P.s. old blues= beyond awesome.
P.s.s  dreamt of taking pictures of ghosts last nite. Pretty sure they were playing simon says. Also, a friend was singing some emo/jared leto, I wear eyeliner and can’t see past my hardcore hair song while the pictures were being taken at a shindig. My dreams are on drugs.

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I’d say this is all random…but that would be cliche for me.

Late nite whatevers, I suppose I drank too much caffeine tonite…so here I am. Granted, if I went and laid down I am fairly sure I would be out in .2 seconds. I’m not giving in though. Sleep takes up entirely too much of life as of late. It’s becoming a sort of nemesis. I think in the end, it will still win. I never stood a chance. My computer is constantly challenging me about my language. Apparently, it doesn’t appreciate my lingual creativity. Why you gots to bring me down? Yea, it just tried to auto-correct that sentence. I denied it like what. No, that wasn’t a question. Tomorrow I will probably see this entry and find out it was all written in Spanish or some such nonsense. You never can tell what will roll out of your mouth at 2 am. I get into a nice vibe when i write to certain songs and turn into a teenage girl, repeating them over and over. It’s horrid…and necessary all at the same time. I’d like to drop some life changing information on you right now…but it’s not going to happen. Phhsh, you want some life changing info, find it yourself. What I have to say won’t matter as much as what you find on your own. There, even while trying to not be yoda, I’ve succeeded in failing. Fantasteriffic. NO, you may NOT auto-correct me, MAC! I love it for trying though. Curse the days of PC’s!
So, apparently some royals got hitched, an outlaw got caught. I’m not much on the news lately. Forgive me if I am skeptical of all the info provided to me by media outlets. It’s paranoia, I know. But is it justified paranoia…perhaps. Of course that is in reference as to weather Willy and Katie tied the knot. I saw no official documents. I won’t be had this time! Alright, this is just babble now.
I think the dog is getting impatient with me. He keeps sighing really heavily and looking at me. Rushed by a dog. This is messed up. I’m thinking I should win something soon. It’s about time. Been awhile. Just my luck it will be like a dental tray and a thing of mint floss. I hope it’s waxed. Lately I have this feeling that I am going to win everything. I think it might be false confidence. The world makes me have unrealistic expectations. It was this or thinking that I could be like a super model. I figured this was a healthier delusion…and I get to eat. Food really is the best thing since sliced bread…wait…I don’t think that works here. I read through a college guide today. You know, researching classes available to figure out what I want to be when I leave Neverland. There were classic course option such as: Equine pathology, advanced walking techniques I and II, Outdoor adventure education & spanish for the equine industry.  I kid you not. Remind me why college is valid any more? A college diploma is about as reassuring to an employer as an employee of the month plaque from Burger King. It really is a grab bag out there, folks. You never know what you are going to get. Granted, there are good colleges with courses with practical applications. This was obviously not one of them. I think those are few and far between and mostly end up caught in tornados and dropped outside of the continental U.S. (sorry Puerto Rico..that’s a no-go for you too). I’m just bitter…and realistic…but mostly bitter.
And on that note, I’m off to dream about celebrities. I don’t have a choice in the matter. Last nite, Claire Danes was a librarian. I’m pretty sure she was trying to help me escape. It was a mix between Indiana Jones & the Last Crusade and Anne Frank.  I think Dr. Elsa Shneider & I probably shared the same fate in the end. I don’t remember, but I have bad knees and always run like I’m about to have a heart attack in dreams.  On a good moral note, I wasn’t carrying a wooden goblet…so I am probably good on karma. If it’s a dream about high school, I’m going to be in a nasty mood tomorrow. There have been a lot of Heroes references in my dreams as of late. So, I might have super powers…like the ability to walk backwards really fast or bake things in the oven really, really speedily. Utterly useless. The dog is telling me lights out. I’m not even spellchecking…that’s how hardcore I am.

There are so many annoying songs about rain…

It’s been a shocking amount of time since last I posted. Every time I hear the word “shocking” I just think of Will Ferrel in the movie Elf. Some of you get that…some of you don’t. I’m not explaining. So, as of late…well not a whole lot of what you would call “enthralling” things have gone down. The weather has been grade A awesome. Well, it rained today…a lot. The little girl I watch a couple days a week told me that her nana’s mom makes the thunder. I’m not sure exactly what she means there. Needless to say, I just let that one slide. I find that when I try to correct a three year old, I still end up being wrong in the end. Not sure how that works.

Great Grandma, is that you?

This entry isn’t going to be devoted to anything in particular. I’ll just fill you in on the to-do’s and the to-don’ts of my every day whatnots and thing-a-majigs.
First, been trying to whittle down my Netflix queue. I’m not really succeeding too swell there. I’ll never conquer it. I think that may be a good thing though. I watched the movie Easy A the other nite. It was so-so. I’m a little on the fence about it. Let’s just put it this way…I would never purchase it. However, Fred Armisen was enjoyable, despite the fact his role was very minor.
Next, and this is the old school section that will bore the youngins no doubt, I watched An Affair to Remember and Roman Holiday. Now both I am embarrassed to say I have not watched previous to this day. I’m not proud of myself when I say that…but it’s the truth. Both were very good…as I knew they would be.
Look kids, I kept that segment short and sweet so you wouldn’t pass out on your keyboards and wake up with square shapes imprinted on the side of your face. Some of you deserve that though. I however, am not the bringer of punishments and will therefore let it sliiiiide.
Heroes has been on our viewing schedule lately. We are playing catch up. Note: people do not say one-liners in real life. Claire, stop it.

This is a little tid bit I would like to refer to as “The Double Edged Sword”

would be utterly useless. People are such morons.

This segment is going to be both things that I love and hate at the same time. Hence the whole topic name. Let’s begin..
1. Background noises in songs. First, they can be awesome and add to the music in unanticipated ways. However, sometimes they sound like phones and I find myself searching for  the phone  only to realize, they got me..again.

2. Dry erase boards. Fun to write on? Of course.  Easy to use? Naturally. At some point though, they become a little evil. eg. Things don’t erase as they should, your hands are covered in red marker dust every time you touch them. the markers stop working well and it defeats the whole purpose. Purpose of course being ease of use and less time consuming.  Chalk boards are just mostly evil..despite being enjoyable to write on.

3. Corduroy. Now I love corduroy fabric. I think it’s super comfy and looks snazzy…depending on what has been made out of it of course. Skivvies should NOT be made of corduroy…EVER. This should go without saying…but somewhere out there someone is shocked to hear such a revelation. Now the downside…both heat and feel. Sometimes, it feels like a million bucks. Other times, it’s like nails on that evil chalk board I previously mentioned. Friction. I don’t know what it is about corduroy that makes it so darn frictiony. I mean, I guess I can look at it and figure the scenario out…but it’s RIDICULOUSLY frictiony..like start a camp fire ridiculous. Just saying, do not wear corduroy while camping. Smokey will resent you for the rest of forever.

corduroy friction fire. You can run but you will just make it worse.

4. Ahh the obvious caffeine. Now the love reason is beyond apparent. Then there is the hate. Not the whole “keeping me awake when I want to be sleeping thing.” That’s fair game. You drink it, you deal with it. Or the, ironic in this case, phrase…”you make your bed, you sleep in it.” Which you obviously will not be doing. I however could sleep like a baby after guzzling three two liter bottles of mt. dew and downing an entire coffee beanery. (neither of which would I do) You get the gist though. No, the hate is from dun dun dun…withdrawl. That’s right. That hangover feeling that comes when caffeine is not administered in regular increments like glucose to a diabetic. Caffeine, the crack of the law-abiding citizen.

5. Singles. No, not ones. I happen to rather like one dollar bills.  I am talking about music singles. I know that it’s giving out a little taste of what is to come on the entire cd. The bacon on the filet mignon. Well, unless you are talking pop music, then it’s like the suction cups on the still moving squid that is wrapped around your chop stick and might quite possibly choke you. In that sense (the filet mignon sense)…good. However, after about five plays, I will probably not want to hear that song for a good long while. It doesn’t matter if the song is amazing. Once it has been killed…it’s hard to bring it back. And even if it does get saved…it’s never quite the same again. Much like zombies.

I’m sure there will be more of these to come in the future. It is inevitable. For now though…the sword is sheathed. Well not the sword in the picture  because that’s just not happening.

The Road to recovery is littered with distractions and…ohh something shiny.

I think I’m just writing tonite. If you are all behaved little children, I may bestow on you a pretty picture at the end of my rantings and filler. This whole daylight savings thing seems to be an utter and complete was of my valuable time. I’m convinced there’s no purpose for it except to…wait, I’ve got nothing.  There is only one man who should control time, and that is none other than the one and only Doctor Who. I pity you if you are ignorant in the ways of the time lord. I’ll let is slip this time though because I’ve just displayed my geeky side and am hoping people forget that little detail about my inner workings.

Show last nite at Mojo was Awesome with a capital “A”. I do have to say, that that is one ridiculously small stage though. I felt bad for everyone because the lights were rather on the bright side as well. With all the beer and sweat that gets poured on that stage on a regular basis,  there’s no way that thing isn’t a petri dish of bacteria. C’est la vie. Everyone played well though, despite the cramped conditions and heat issues. Minus Francis’ slow motion moshing with no one during Iron Man, all was well in the world.  It was just like this…minus the water. Also, side note…must eat before going out. Rooms will spin. Ok, so let’s recap the night.

 

Jagger was doing his best hands impression in front of me
Corey Haim sung at one point.
aaaaand Francis Buxton angered the locals. No pitchforks or torches emerged though.

I found this little gem today. Time line doppelgangers…after horrific lifestyle choices.

 

El Chupacabra in his present form...

 

The vision of what's to come? If this comes to fruition...Chuey gets put down. He would want it that way.

Alright, so not as much writing as I originally supposed. I will leave you with this little tid bit I discovered. Life was weird in a whole different sort of way back in the day.

Advertisement genius.

 

well hello, ladies and gents…prepare yourselves.

I don’t know what you are preparing yourselves for…so best to prepare for all eventualities. End of the world? Make sure you’re on the up and up. End of the week? Make sure you get up to the Black Hand show at Mojo Main. Don’t  say you weren’t forewarned.

Alright. So let’s take on a subject I don’t really care that much about…but want to take on any way. Charlie Sheen. He gets his own sentence because he’s been in the lime light so often as of late. First off, it was Charlie Sheen that was dropped…not the Simpsons.  I’m being blunt and harsh…but it’s the only life I know.  Let’s break down his career and see if tears should be shed.

  1. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Three Musketeers, The Rookie, The Big Bounce…I’m willing to say are enjoyable. Two of which, he has side roles in. Big Bounce only gets to be included because of Morgan Freeman…so I’m not sure that really even counts.
  2. All Dogs Go to Heaven 2, Hot Shots one and deux, aaaand Scary Movie 4….really? Not great contributions to our time.
  3. Brother to Emilio Estevez

Ok, so I’m not sure why number three was listed. It just seems like that is something working against him..for obvious reasons. I mean think of all the incredible Emilio Estevez flicks you have seen in your life time. Go ahead, I’ll wait. What? Back already? That was a short trip to nowhere and back on the public transit of movie failures. But we’re not here to attack Emilio. He gave up and went home years ago..and we’re all the better for it. Thank you, Emilio for standing up and doing the right thing for your country. Now, back to Charlie ol’ boy..or should I say Carlos Irwin Estevez?  And how weird is it that his dad took on Sheen as an acting name  (taken from the reverend Sheen) and then his son and wife took on the name as well? Reality is starting to blur. It’s the D&D of name conundrums. I’m done with Carlos…for now.

So, I have this problem. I’m thinking of seeking help for it…well, ok, that’s not entirely true. I have like five bands that I listen to non-stop because they rock the socks off the competition. I’m the sort that can listen to a cd or watch a movie I love up and down, back and forward until I’m dreaming in DVD/CD formats. I’m not saying it’s healthy…but it’s a nice way to live. Michael is not this way. I think I drag him down with me. He will tell me to pick a cd to listen to and I always come back with the same 40 cds…without fail. Then he says something along the lines of, “We’ve got over 3o0 cds. Why do you always pick the same ones?” They’re just in my blood. It’s band loyalty. However, I do like to listen to other stuff. I just won’t be the one to pick the cd. Eg. I pick Clutch and QOTSA the most. Today I decided to mix it up and listen to…Them Crooked Vultures. Now, you might be able to see the humor in this. Never stray to far from the cd hive. I do need to get some new music though. I never find new bands I like these days. If you have any suggestions…feel free to drop them on me. Leave the speed punk, emo, 80’s metal, and pop at home though. I didn’t say country…but I assumed that was a given.

Hot Tamale

The Fail Edition…Costume Stylie

Seriously? You're doing it wrong.You be the judge.

David Gest?

Chicken goooooooood.

You've never seen jabba quite like this....for a reason.

supposed to be Bowie channeling his inner Jareth. I see Ron Pearlman and his 80's tv version of Beauty & the Beast. To each her own.

Leave your kids out of your creepy habits.

Guess we don't have to worry about the pants issue.

Some say Noah...I say Haggrid.

When Cabbage Patches go wrong.

No.

Your Co-workers should NEVER see you like this...EVER.

Insert something hilarious here, throw head back and laugh. Start to Choke and then regain control.

This is going to be contrived of completely random whatevers that might happen to have popped into my head as of late. I simply feel like writing…and I will not be denied. The other day I was pondering, and I realized that if David Bowie and Tilda Swinton had a baby, it would be the truly most androgynous child in the history of ever.

Bowie

Tilda

Bowie + Swinton = La Roux

Moving on, saw a helicopter the other day and had a sudden desire to go on an adventure. Maybe that’s my inner Rambo speaking. Better than my inner jean claude van damme talking. I think it’s best to keep that one smothered…with a big down pillow. AAAAnd here’s why…

Jazz Hands

Saw this on yahoo a couple days ago and think this would be stellar. Well, at least until it comes time to skivvy down. Then, maybe not so cool.

the bubble tent

By the way, I need to clean up all the dog deposits in my yard now that spring is rearing its lovely head. However, I was reminded of this because my neighbor was out doing it and then I felt too weird to “mirror” her  over the fence…so I didn’t. Neighbor -one…me – zero. You win this round, Lady. I think she’s just an enabler. Another note, ice cream truck…outside…ding-a-linging this afternoon. It’s not THAT spring yet. Meanwhile, Rita’s Water Ice opens in two days. What? It’s totally different. Oh shut up.