I don’t know why it is people love dolls so. In all honesty, I find most of them to be beyond a level of creepy than I could ever handle in my house. Apparently, other people don’t mind having little glass eyeballs watching them live their every day lives. I myself don’t want to look under my  bed and be attacked by the clown that used to be sitting on the chair in the corner. And so begins the doll edition. I’m sorry if I make it hard for you to get a good REM cycle tonite. If I can’t purge my mind of them…then neither can  you.

First the vintage creepos.

Is she looking at you? You'll never know.

Please? Just let me take over your life and you can have mine.

Now…next we will touch upon places they took Barbie that never should have happened. Ok, so some of these are obviously not on stores shelves.


Avian Flu Barbie.


Ok, so this one I can condone.


Everything within arms reach

Now, never have I  looked at Amish people and thought, “Man, they’re creepy.” However, it seems like whenever people decide to make “Amish dolls” ( that is dolls of the Amish…not the dolls that Amish people make) they come out like something out of a horror movie. I don’t know why it is that they can’t seem to make them look like normal human beings…but these will NEVER be in close proximity to me.  And so the awfulness begins.


Where to begin? Oh, I know...how about the glazed over death eyes.

a magic wishing apple. One bite and alllll your dreams will come true.

Look at the boy. He looks like he is in his 30's. Possibly Louie Anderson as a baby?

Staging a coup.

Apparently, the Jane eyre of Amish dolls. Hopefully they made Mr. Rochester, or she's up the creek without a paddle.

Obviously a Brandon Teena sort of scenario.

And Last but not least, a different sort of doll. I don’t know…for some reason I rather like them. Go figure.

I'm not sure who actually gets this doll. I mean, if you gave a kidney, I guess you could. Maybe a part of your liver. Other than that, I don't think you are going to be around to ENJOY this particular treasure.